2+4=Hell

Everyone has a name for the ages/phases that our children go through, terrible 2 etc. Hey here’s an idea why don’t we stop giving parents false hope…When your in the terrible 2’s and the 3rd birthday is looming closer you think to yourself “man this is it, this is where I get my lovely sweet child back” Ummm that would be a NO. As when terrible 2’s are over then the farking 3’s begin closely followed by the f**k you mammy 4’s.

Why don’t we just come out and say it, as soon as the 18 month mark hits you’re doomed until they get married. The “oh it gets easier” and the “it doesn’t last long” is just a load of old bull, lets just stop pretending and say it like it is when you become a parent you’ve signed a death warrant for your stress levels and if stress doesn’t kill you then liver cirrhosis will from a giant increase in alcohol consumption.

I was told the other day “I’m the one who decided to open my legs” Really? charming, I’d like to think that it was a little more romantic, meaningful and a hell of a lot special than that. However yes, yes I did make the decision to have children but that doesn’t cancel out my rights to expressing my frustration to parenting. Please don’t get me wrong I adore my children too, with all my heart, I always sign you are my sunshine to the children before they sleep & last night Miss C joined in with me, cute was not the word it was special and I will always have that moment. LPV is growing so fast he’s so clever border lining on smart arse we always have a cuddle while he’s getting dressed for school, I know this won’t last for much longer as I see the I hate you phase in my not too distant future.

However at the moment I have a 2-year-old and 4-year-old and OMG it’s so hard they’re bringing to really love each other but when they don’t its awful, have you ever put a 2yr old and 4 yr old in time out at the same time? They make noises so shrill that only dogs can hear them. I try not to shout or be aggressive in my speech to them but it’s so difficult. Take for instance I took Miss C to some baby event in the park the other day, now I have two children I usually avoid these things like the plague they cause me more stress. I take Miss C to the play equipment I tell her she has to wait her turn….que crying, even when she gets her turn she’s been crying for so long she doesn’t know why she started in the first place. This lasts at least 20mins and I try everything, ignoring, the oh darling’s etc until I just scream stop crying!!!

Forgetting I’m in the judgement pit where all new mothers come to comment on experienced parents child rearing, I feel around 100 pairs of eyes burning into my back. Where is the sisterhood that I thought parenthood was all about.  I was rescued by a friend taken to lunch and  Miss C was an absolute angel…..Really????

I know I don’t think there are any really helpful answers out there, parenting is a beautiful minefield and I’m glad to be walking through it, I just wish I brought more wine……

What you talking about Willis

What you talking about Willis

3 thoughts on “2+4=Hell

  1. Confessions Of An Irish Mammy says:

    Yep. 2 boys 4 (tomorrow) and 5.5 When they’re together they’re loud hyper and scary. Sometimes they get on great and its lovely, mostly they kill each other and are actually getting to the point where the fists are coming out. I reckon in a couple of years there’ll be black eyes. 🙈

  2. muminamerc says:

    I will not tell you of the horrendous times we are having with the 17 and 14 year old at present. The 11 year old is still fun and the 9 year old makes it all worth while. I would so swap the older 2 kids for the 2 nd 4 year olds though. Valium, chocolate and a good handy man for the zones destroyed around the house – all good plans I find. xx Hang on in there.

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