That’s right I feel like a new Mammy, this weekend I had some girlfriends over from Bristol so I had the weekend off thanks the legend that is expatdaddy. I missed my two men but It felt good to drink beer in the middle of the day, go into a shop that the buggy could fit through and actually look around shops without two boys with glazed looks on their faces as their bored. I wasn’t just wife and Mammy for the day, I was me again and to be honest I haven’t laughed so much like that in a long time. It was well overdue.
Of course we took in the culture
through our lungs, we went to the Anne Frank Huis which was suitably depressing but very interesting and thought-provoking. I am actually shocked as to many people know don’t know who Anne Frank is, I am shocked that I KNEW who she was but unfortunately I really don’t think Fatima Whitbred son’s Huis would get the same amount of tourists visiting, even tho he does look like Andy from Cbeebies apparently. Anyhoo back to parts of the blog that more than 3 people will understand, we’d had enough of the serious culture so decided it was time to smoke soak up some real Amsterdam smut!! We went to a lovely wee bar tried a few belgium beers waited til dark and visited the Red light Garden district. My oh My how disappointed I was walking past the windows of girls who were just sat there on their iphones texting. Now I’m no financial genius but even I know that’s not going to get you much business, C’mon girls putt some welly into it!!****
If we hadn’t had enough smut already it was time for more at the Sex museum, only 4 euro to get in!! Bargin!! Well, some of it was hilarious, actually most of it, some of it was an eye opener and the rest was just utter filth, I will not be taking either set of parents there. We were however greeted but a overwight flasher on arrival, fake obviously but funny “hey” in husky voice “psssst” then he comes out of his hiding place and flashes you, with his widger what I can only say looks like over cooked “BEAN CURD”*****. Anyhoo it all got too much and 4 sleepy gals hit the train then the bus then the walk home by then we were ready to have a cuppa and act our age again.
**** I like to State for the record I am not a pervert & None were harmed in the writing of this blog
*****bean Curd is an odd adjective but I was challenged to get it into my blog somewhere, apologies to vegetarian the world over if you were eating bean curd at the time of reading!!