Children says the funniest things

Jack points to a tree and says ‘doggy’ I wonder if this is because the other day during our walk I explained that ‘a tree has bark on it… Kind of like a dog barks… but tree bark’ hmm maybe I should leave explaining day-to-day things for Benn  to do.

This is a Facebook status of a good friend of mine!! It made me laugh so much and has inspired me to write this post. Because of all the things of parenthood this is one of the things I dread the most explanations of things. Especially the Sex talk now I now I have years before that but I have to say I think I’ll hand that one to expatdaddy on a silver platter. Some how I really don’t think that LPV will fall easily for babies come from the cabbage patch or freezer section at Asda.

I remember when I was teaching, one day me and my class had a heated discussion on where milk came from, they said from Spinneys I said from a cow, NO NO NO Miss Tracy, mamma buys it from Spinneys. In reality is sad as children here in Dubai are missing out on so much visits to the farms, proper zoo’s where you can feed the animals.

When I was expecting LPV my sweet students were asking me about the baby, some of the questions were ‘was I going to vomit the baby up’ (if only it was that easy, men would do it). ‘Can we see it?, No cos it’s inside my tummy, Oh! How did it get there Miss Tracy, did you swallow it?’ What will you call it? Don’t know, We think you should it Rainbow Triceratops (awesome we did consider this for a while) I love children’s imaginations, their innocence. The question is when they need explanations of horrid things do we tell them the truth or let them keep their innocence for longer and sugar coat life for them.

I remember being told when I was younger that, the green smarties I was given on christmas eve were sleeping pills. Also I you played with your Belly button you’d bleed to death (excellent, it worked well tho as know I have a phobia of belly buttons, which was great fun when LPV’s cord fell out)

I talk to LPV everyday all day, there are some days that this is a struggle as I’m tired but I actually chew his ear off most days for my own sanity too. I usually get a ba or da but mostly he looks like what on earth is bird on about. Whilst in a lift at the mall, LPV was a lot smaller than he is now I think he was actually in the pram. I was sharing it with a woman who thought I was insane as I was talking to LPV on the journey up the 2nd floor (babyshops) We stopped at floor 1, I said to LPV, one this number 1 and show him one with my finger. On exiting the lift the woman turned to me in disgust ‘you do realise that he can’t understand you don’t you’ Ummmmmm yes Einstein but it’s called interaction!!

Some people have no clue

Expat mammy.xx


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